Inchoate Thoughts

Let us talk in vague generalities about people of indistinct identities and indeterminate locales. About me and about people who may or may not realize this post is about them… and, moreover, for no particular reason whatsoever, except that I don’t feel like studying for crim right this moment. How does that sound?

It sounds like a grand idea to me, so here we go…

I

There are certain classes of people anywhere you go that seem to relentlessly seek to classify people as either “for” or “against” them. Many people who do not know me well would say that I’m one of those people. This is, of course, simply false. More specifically, I don’t particularly care whether individuals like me or not. Granted, life would suck just a little if nobody liked me, but that’s not the case, so I’m not worried. This lack of caring, coupled with my desire to just be honest with people when I think it will be more helpful than harmful, leads me to say things to people that they might not want to hear. Sometimes I say these things in answer to questions they ask, but sometimes I just offer the opinions unsolicited¹. On more than one occasion, this has lead people to become offended, strongly dislike me, think that I’m an asshole, or some combination of those things. While it’s unfortunate that those folks are so adverse to honesty (when they don’t like it), there’s not much I can do about that, and I hardly can bring myself to care. I like to be up front with people because I either care too much or not enough to lie to them.

II

Hypocrisy is not a binary state, it’s a continuum. There are people who are hypocritical and there are people who are hypocrites, and there’s no easy distinction to be made between the two. I feel as though we’ve all been made hypocrites at one point or another in our lives… that doesn’t excuse it, and it doesn’t make it any less disappointing when someone you have respect for engages in it, but it’s something to keep in mind.

III

The finals? They’re not that bad. I’m not the guy who’s getting A’s, but I really feel like lots of people make more out of them than there is. That’s probably just their style. If it works for them, that’s good. Personally, I’ve taken the approach that there are other things in my life more or equally important. Like relaxing and sleeping.

IV

Eleanor Roosevelt said “Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.” Surprisingly, there are a lot of things that nobody can make you do without your permission. One of them is dragging you into drama. There are lots of people running around saying “I don’t want to get involved” in any of the various dramas occurring lately. That’s an easy one: just don’t get involved. Being involved is an act of commission, and the only person who can “drag you in” to the drama is yourself. Other people can try to bring you in, they can talk about you in re: the drama, but they cannot drag you in. You have to carry yourself. Being stressed is a choice. Being involved in drama is a choice. Being stressed about being involved in drama is doubly a choice. In the vast majority of cases, one who says “so and so made me get involved” is simply trying to find an excuse for something they wanted to do anyway.

V

One of the most amazing things about law school is that we’ve been here for a semester and who we see others to be is still slipping and changing and being clarified. There are those who I thought were tools, and I’m finding out they aren’t. There are those I thought were tools, then changed my mind, but I’m changing it back. There are those who I’ve known from day one are great, and those I’ve known from day one are awful. And all of those things could still change. It’s so dynamic. I mean, hypothetically, you could’ve thought Person A was one-dimensional and shallow… then been convinced otherwise by a great acting job… and then come to realize you were right all along. Not that this has happened. And then there’s the whole thing that for a while most of our impressions of people were based on appearances and limited exposure… that’s getting better all the time.

VI

I guess some people thought I was a gunner. Then they changed their minds when they saw how laid back I’ve been about finals. Really, folks? A gunner? Cue the entire University of Alabama, including buildings and other inanimate objects, laughing really, really hard.

VII

I’m doing a little research, or will be soon, into something that I read that was morally and intellectually insulting. If it shakes out the way it looks like it will, it could be a big deal. Or maybe not. Who knows. I guess it depends on how much I care once I’ve got the data in front of me. Also, it depends on clowns.

VIII

There is no VIII.

IX

After all of this law and all of these words and the whole concept of arguing your point and things being “maybe” right “depending” on other things, I’m really, really looking forward to doing some coding over the break where there are many right ways to get to an answer, but only one right answer… it’s going to be great. I miss programming… but by the end of break I think I’ll be ready to do something besides that… like arguing with the semi-literate².

X

Well, I got this far, so I figured I needed to have a tenth one. I guess there are two further things I could point out that V. — in conjunction with other factors — has caused a) my interest in certain members of my class to be piqued and b) me to realize that people who say everyone in the class is amazing maybe right… but only because there are some who are ‘amazingly dense’ or ‘amazingly shallow’ or ‘amazingly anal.’

Anyway… there’s my update. All preceding parts are wholly separate from each other (unless otherwise specified) if you’ve got a beef, sell it to a butcher or invite me over for burgers. Or I guess you could leave a comment. If you labeled it with which random thought you’re referring to, that’d be helpful.

Also, good luck on your Crim Finals, 1Ls, but understand that one quarter of you will not be doing as well as I will. *sticks out tongue*

¹ I always keep in mind the quote from Atlas Shrugged which goes “It is not advisable . . . to venture unsolicited opinions. You should spare yourself the embarrassing discovery of their exact value to your listener.”

² Only kidding. I’ll probably actually be looking forward to doing school work again, not arguing with those folks.