Poopachino and Long Pants

Dave Barry’s column from yesterday (which is actually from 1999) is pretty freakin’ funny.

It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity. I bet this kind of thing does not happen to heroin addicts. I bet that when serious heroin addicts go to purchase their heroin, they do not tolerate waiting in line while some dilettante in front of them orders a hazelnut smack-a-cino with cinnamon sprinkles.

The reason some of us need coffee is that it contains caffeine, which makes us alert. Of course it is very important to remember that caffeine is a drug, and, like any drug, it is a lot of fun.

Also, if any of you enjoy the Strongbad Emails on Homestarrunner.com, I think you’ll thoroughly enjoy this week’s.

STRONG BAD: Get some what?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I dunno. Light globes?

STRONG BAD: {sotto voce} Light globes.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You know, like in a lamp! Light globes! {his pants shine again}

STRONG BAD: So… you put on hotpants in the hopes of getting some lightbulbs.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Globes. {his pants shine again}

STRONG BAD: Well, since you’re here, let’s talk about your pants. Or your lack thereof. Daisy Dukes aside.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What are you talking about, Strong Bad? I wear long pants.

STRONG BAD: Um… no, from what I can tell, you wear no pants and have blue soles glued to the bottoms of your feet. {indicates Homestar’s feet}

Good stuff… good stuff…