These Boots Were Made For….

So I’ve been thinking….

While at work, if I make good on my visceral urge to kick anyone who gets close enough, would that be considered grounds for workers comp?

I mean, would it depend upon the severity of the injury? “No” if they’re only limping for a day or two and “Yes” if I somehow manage to take their leg off below the knee? (Or is it simply a question regarding which side of the thin-edge dividing line between worker’s comp and long term disability said kicking would fall on?)

I really, really need to know. With the animosity I’ve been feeling toward anyone work-related as of late, this information may be crucial to the decision-making process. It could also be a good way to work out my aggressions at the company’s expense.

“Kicked by payroll clerk.” I think that’d look great on the application….