Dear Encyclopetia readers,
I need help and I figured, with Pete’s large audience I’d be able to get a few good suggestions! (= …now see that’s a true upsidedown frown.. at any rate.
So there’s these two guys, THEY WON’T BACK OFF. At first it was managable, I just took it in jest and shrugged it off. A month later, advances are still coming at me! You’d think a month of every compliment being taken as a joke and …not paying any attention to you would make you get the idea. Apparently not.
The problem is that I can’t really tell them “I don’t like you, in that way” because A) I don’t know if they actually do for sure, I don’t want to just prematurely reject someone and thereby making an ass out of myself and B) I will have to see/work with them for at least a couple more months.
Hiding to avoid boys,
Irene
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February 27th, 2004 at 9:34 pm
I wish I had a suggestion for you. Actually, I wish I got that much attention! Hang in there Irene!
February 27th, 2004 at 11:06 pm
A couple of years ago I had an internship at an engineering firm, and worked with only adult male engineers. Over the course of the internship, two of them paid me too much attention for my liking. (v. creepy!) They were both married too. Gross!
I employed the technique of ignoring them all the time, bordering on semi-rudeness. For instance, if they were talking to me, and a response wasn’t necessary, I just wouldn’t respond. You have to find a way to give off that “you’re a creep and I hate you, leave me alone!” vibe without saying anything.
Anyway, after several weeks of giving off the “I hate you” vibe via ignoring, giving facial expressions that said “I think you’re an idiot” etc… they stopped. Success!
February 28th, 2004 at 6:17 am
I think you need to adopt a better approach. To most men, laughing off compliments generally says, this person is too humble or insecure to take a compliment. That’s not what you’re trying to get across.
There’s nothing wrong with saying, “Pete - what’s up? Do you think there’s ever going to be anything between us?” When put on the spot, Pete will either fess up or say no.
If he fesses up, you just say, “Well, I’m not really sure. You’re a neat-o guy, but I just need some friends right now. Cool?” Pete will have to go along with it because the line is now clear.
If Pete says he doen’t think y’all are gonna date, then you just agree. “Yeah, I see us hanging out sometime as friends.”
You’re a woman, and that means you can always change your mind and jusmp Pete’s bones at some point. Pete knows this and will just try to respect the limits.
On the off chance that Pete’s a stalker, make sure you make it clear to people when you & Pete are together - you’re just friends. “Hey, Julie, have you met Pete? He’s a friend of mine.”
February 28th, 2004 at 8:18 am
You know, Irene, if you bury them in the sculpture garden, you’ll never have to hear from them again.
February 28th, 2004 at 3:56 pm
the easiest way to get rid of these mopes…tell them (casually) that you rekindled and old love. that should set them back a bit. semper fi