They say that no man is an island, but there are times in this life that we feel so utterly alone and we don’t think we could be any less connected to our fellow man. We feel that we have nothing in common and wonder what the point is in even continuing in society. It’s at times like these that we must search wide and deep for binding similarities that enjoin us to our neighbors and show us the true nature of humanity. I have for you today one of those very things.
The next time you feel this way stop to consider one of the most widespread similarities in society today: by and large, we all think that we’re good drivers. More accurately, maybe, we all feel like every other driver on the road is a freakin’ moron.
The glorious part is that it’s TRUE!
No, really, think about it. Here in tuscaloosa, we have a mass of drivers to stop for “Yield” signs and run red lights. We’ve got Bubba in his 8-ton pickup truck from 1902 and any variety of ghetto-sleds — the drivers of each have a very distinctive style of driving. Bubba drives along in much the same way that a tribal african would wander the halls of a great American Library. The ghetto-sled driver — a bull in that same library. Then of course you have the women who, god love ‘em, can’t bring themselves to concentrate on anything outside of a 1 foot radius of their body… which causes them to be constantly preoccupied with their make-up and cell phones.
And we all know to avoid cars that have proof of previous accidents… those people were OBVIOUSLY the cause, and we should stay as far away as possible. And let’s not forget the slow-pokes who want to drive 5 MPH slower than you or the maniacs that want to go 5 MPH faster. I mean… the list just goes on forever.
There are almost as many stupid ways to drive as there are stupid drivers, and we ALL know how many of those there are.
