The School, The School, The School is on Fire!

Two nights ago I was sitting up having an argument a spirited conversation at 4:00am with a certain person, and I heard the city fire sirens going off. No big deal, or so I thought.

Yesterday we all came to find out that the fire was actually at the High School, and had been burning since sometime shortly after 1:00am. The Pantagraph reports (in this article) that they’re still investigating. Sources tell me, however, that they found a stray brick that they believe was cast through a window into the High School Office.

In light of these recent events, I’ve determined that Lexington High School should take a few steps to make things a little less sombre. They are as follows:

• Change school mascott from “The Minutemen” to “The Fire”
• T-Shirt Slogan: “We’re on fire!” (and all variations)
• Change school colors from Purple and White to Red and Grey
• Get Smokey the Bear Smoulder the Janitor to start an ad campaign: “Only you can prevent office fires.”
• Set fire to the Jr. High and Gradeschool… we’re in this together, right?
• Detentions, henceforth, will consist of standing outside of the school with a fire hose.
• Fire drills, in the future, will involve actual fires.

There are a few other things that I need to write about, but that’ll have to wait. That’s all for now… if you have additions to the list, post them below. (Feel free to be tasteless, nobody was hurt)